My Beautiful Family

My Story

Here’s my story, I am the oldest of 3 girls and I grew up in a chaotic environment. Not knowing childhood anxiety was a thing, it was a part of what I thought was my normal life.

When I was 10 years old a traumatic event happened in my life and it forced me to grow up and even faster because I was the oldest and I needed to help my family and my younger sisters.

This traumatic event was hard on my whole family. The ups and downs of life's roller coaster felt unbearable and beyond unsafe and unsure. But it also felt normal. Because it was my life and I was so close to the fire I wasn’t able to see the clear dysfunction.

The traumatic event (and the little pieces that add up to alot) broke the camel's back and ended my parents' marriage. But life started to get even messier, even more unpredictable, and for some of us, has left such a mark, that made life feel like it's not even worth living.

At Least that’s what I see from my sweet sister. She is the youngest of the pack and she definitely didn’t get the life I lived. Even though my upbringing wasn’t picture perfect, there was at least somewhat of a picture for me.

Life showed my sister at a young age that it is messy, messed up, and completely unsafe. The foundation was completely missing. More so, it felt like there was a foundation but it was built on a sinkhole that caved in.

By 13 years old, my sister dropped out of school, hit up the hard drugs, and ran homeless FOR YEARS!!!

I remember hearing someone knocking at my door at 2 am, it was scary because I had moved out and I was living on my own at that time. I heard my sister's voice calling my name from outside and of course I let her come in to stay the night. I gave her my clothes, food, my love and as much support as I had within me.

Her drugs grabbed her at such a young age, at such a tough time, they have completely taken over her life and I know I am blessed that she is still here today. She has spent the past decade in and out of rehabs, losing herself in the drugs and what that world provides.

Just like the day she showed up at 2 am with nowhere to go, with just the clothes on her back, asking for HELP. I know, even if she isn’t knocking or asking for help, she wants it deep within and because of the drug dependency, she is not able to ask for it or seek it herself.

I know I am being called to HELP. To help myself first, to help others, and to help my sister!

Peace & Happiness,

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